'Everyone is invited but me': Employee gets excluded from company dinner, decides to crash the event instead of inquiring boss about the missing invitation

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  • 01
    "Should I crash the dinner?"
  • 02
    I wasn't invited to the company dinner next week
  • 03
    I only found out about it because another coworker asked me if I'm going. I hadn't heard of it. She pulled up the invite in front of me- everyone is invited but me. The woman who sent the invite
  • 04
    isn't my boss but I do a lot of for her. She either forgot I exist or purposely excluded me. How should I react when it comes to light? Hopefully around the dinner table when people ask
  • 05
    where I am! I'm not exactly forgettable so it feels intentional. Should I crash the dinner?? Edit: wow this blew up! To level set, I don't want to go anyway.
  • 06
    Just asking how best to handle this as I am offended I wasn't invited. Had I been invited I would have gone (I love free food and drink and I'm sure it will be fancy) Now my main concern is
  • 07
    how to get out of it if/when she realizes she "forgot" me (or someone calls it to her attn that I'm Not on the list). I would never accept a last minute invite and don't accept being an after
  • 08
    thought. So what do I do if I get that last second invite?? Last edit for now- disabling notifications. I think most working people understand the slight here. Will report back later in the week
  • 09
    Tuesday update: she still hasn't invited me and didn't come in to my office today. She did, however, email me some ridiculous task (to find something for her that she had lost) She must be at our office across town,
  • 10
    along with her boss who is also my boss's boss and the whole reason this dinner is happening. Might pop on over across town tomorrow to handle an unrelated task- and run into him by chance on purpose. Might act surprised to see him and ask what's up
  • 11
    Wednesday update: I didn't go to the office across town today bc my boss was over there and that had me thinking she was to blame for the snub. I talked to another coworker who said she told Her about the dinner a week
  • 12
    ago! Then at the end of the day, the new guy asked me if I had been invited. He already knew so apparently ppl are talking about. it and how r de it was to exclude me. One of them said I was on the list my boss provided them - so if that's true it wasn't her fault.
  • 13
    Brighteyed77 Honestly, if it's everyone but you, no harm in having someone else mention it to her, or just asking yourself. It's likely an oversight
  • 14
    HotRodHomebody "Hey, I'm curious, was it just an oversight that I wasn't invited to the dinner? It seems everyone else has invited, is there a reason for that?" Then you will literally get your answer.
  • 15
    mangmillicent • 39m ago • "I dont want to go" "Had I been invited I would have gone...I love free food and drink" Just admit you want to go and ask her about it or have a colleague mention it. Not that serious
  • 16
    Microbemaster2020 I can't tell you the number of times I was doing an invite for something at work and missed someone that I could've sworn I invited. I would guess it's a mistake.
  • 17
    Not_Cleaver Don't bring it up. Don't crash the dinner. There are other reasons you might not have been invited. It might be people who are members of her team or any other thing.
  • 18
    Country-Birds No, u were not invited. I think it's good advice to keep your work life and your personal life separate. After the company dinner, ur bound to find out more info. Perhaps start looking for a different job if this one isn't working out
  • 19
    pwolf1771 Don't crash, also be more choosy about how much you help her next time she needs something.
  • 20
    Mannouhana Don't ask, don't go. Even if she sends you an invite now, don't accept cos you are never in the initial list. Just say you have another engagement that evening. Maintain your dignity.

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